Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
