Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
