I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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