im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
