I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
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