break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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