There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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