Pregnant stripper...not hot.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
i think i just lost a toe
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.