protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream