so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
