I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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