Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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