super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize