a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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