Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
