What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
