Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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