I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
