yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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