I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
