Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
