I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
