What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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