it was like his penis was on wheels.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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