Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
