R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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