Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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