I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
