i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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