He disabled his match.com account in front of me
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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