how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
