I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
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I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
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I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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