hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
