you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Found the puke drawer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize