i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
