Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
