I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
