I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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