Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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