And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
