she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
