so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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