Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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