hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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