:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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