I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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