Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Randomize
