Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
