Define "chronic" masturbator.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
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