I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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