I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
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