It's just like the Real World with babies
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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